The Challenges of Parenthood

Some days, I don't know how I get through without pulling all my hair out. I love my son more than anything but, boy can he frustrate me! Aidan has always loved bath time. In fact, he has cried because it wasn't bath night and he wanted to take a bath. That was until this weekend. All of a sudden now he doesn't want to either take his diaper off or take a bath. There have been a few things that have happened lately that may have contributed to this. Such as.....The other day, it was bath night and we were getting ready to get in. I asked him if he wanted to try to potty before getting in the tub. So he sat and sat and sat. Then he refused to get up. He never actually did anything but, he for some reason wouldn't get up. He eventually got in the tub for a quick bath, but really wasn't interested in it. Also, Daddy has been trying to get rid of Aidan's fear of water in his face by what I refer to as "tough love." Like dumping a bunch of water over his head without warning, turning the shower head on while Aidan's taking a bath without warning, and he's also turned on the facet in the tub while Aidan's in the bath and noise scares him. Now, Julien would tell me I'm coddling him and he'll get over it eventually. I tell him that of course it's the right course of action because he's been so successful with it. (He never appreciates my biting sarcasm.) Tonight, Aidan cried that he didn't want to take a bath and that he didn't want to take off his diaper. I tried to convince him to get in for two minutes then we'd get out. I told him that I'd get in too if he wanted. He cried and screamed so hard that he broke out in hives. I didn't know that could happen. Apparently it can. I got half of him washed and then pulled him out. Once he started to calm the hives went away. In fact, he calmed down once he got a new diaper on. Now about the diapers....Lately we've been encouraging him to try and use the potty. We got him a potty seat that sits on the big potty. He's gone to friends' houses and watched them potty training. If you ask him while he's getting a diaper change, don't you want to use the potty, he'll say , "No, want a diaper change." He's no fool. He couldn't be any less interested. Julien wants him to be potty trained by the time the new baby comes. I'm starting to think that we need to back off and not force a timetable on him. It's frustrating when you know kids that aren't 2 yet and they pee on the potty and your almost 2 1/2 year old won't even sit. I think Julien, as a Dad, is even more susceptible to the pressure to get your kid on the potty. I think though that it's starting to take a toll on Aidan. He doesn't want his diaper off at all. Today, if I took off his diaper to change him, he wanted a new one right away. And he doesn't want it off for bath time. Urgh..... Is it the age he's at? Is it the new baby coming? At this point, he knows that things are changing and it must make him stressed to some point. Maybe he's trying to hang on to some kind of dependence on Mommy and Daddy. Maybe he's just having a bad week. I talked to my mom about it tonight. She said, in her infinite wisdom, in so many words "this to shall pass." She said not to make a big deal out of the bath thing and sponge bathe him until he gets comfortable again. She reminded me that the bigger deal I make out of it the bigger the battle will be. If he says "no" to bath night, just say "ok. we don't have to." Eventually he'll calm down and things will get back to normal. She also reminded me that when he's ready to potty, he'll tell us. He'll know before we will. It's always reassuring to talk to Mom. She's like the voice of reason. Some days, you just need the moral support of someone who's been there. So, tomorrow we will start with a new attitude. We will be more laid back. If he puts up a fight, just let it go. Some battles aren't worth it.